God’s Miracles

God sure has been unimpressive lately, hasn’t he?

Imagine that: we discover the scientific method, documentation, and recording…and the miracles stop coming our way.

Maybe back then he just needed the practice. After all….


He was going around carving entire highways into seas with enormous walls of water rushing up on either side, only to drown a massively huge army in the nick of time.

Then he went around, slaying entire armies with simply the presence of his eternal light while they writhed in agony on the ground, cursing the fate that they were born in the first place.

And then he was able to make the walls of a vast city-state come crashing down merely by the sound of some ram’s horns because they were calling out his name and will.

I’ll admit: so far, that’s all pretty fucking impressive. Bravo.


Encore, please.

Well, there isn’t much of an encore. It’s more of a “period at the end of a sentence” – if that, because it can pretty much be explained by science, medicine, biology, and chemistry. But…let’s see if you’re just as impressed anyway:

What the fuck is that???

Well, apparently: It’s a miracle.  

What it is is bacteria on a communion wafer which turned red in water so, of course, some think it’s a miracle.

I know, I know, the standards that people appear to hold God up to in his declining years appear to have slipped…a lot.

Poor God…maybe he’s just getting too old to go around whacking people on the heads left and right, reshaping entire vast bodies of water, and crashing down enormous stone walls. Perhaps he needs a break because his repertoire has become thoroughly unimpressive.


The Greatest Book Ever?

Dear Theists,

Raging debates in the Atheist and Skeptic communities aside, Richard Dawkins and PZ Meyers were recently debating Muslims outside of the World Atheist Convention (clips on Youtube):

After watching the claims of Muslims, and Christians (in clips of the Atheist Experience) about how wonderful their particular Holy Book is at understanding all things scientific, astronomical, medicinal, and even geological, I really had a simple question to ask them:

What great, enormous, and incredible scientific discoveries have been made of late using only your Holy Book?

I really apologize for such a blunt and rude question which, essentially, states “prove it or shut up”, but I think it’s warranted. Exactly what huge scientific leaps in any field have been made with the Bible or Koran in the last couple of hundred years?

You see, it’s not good enough to dig through your obscure passages and then point to already-discovered knowledge and say “Aha! It was written about in there all along!” Well, if it was, then why didn’t it talk about it more plainly? I’m really sorry to doubt every single thing you claim as science in either book but…quite frankly…I do.

You have two choices on that front now: either put up or shut up. Show us “angry” Atheists out there exactly what science has been done using only the book that you claim was written by the Creator Of The Universe(tm). Such as: decoding the Human Genome (Francis Collins may be a fundamentalist, but he didn’t use the Bible to do his job), discovering the Big Bang, revealing the Theory of Relativity, explaining the Theory of Gravity, creating the transistor and microchip, sending people to the moon, sending rovers to Mars….you name it: show us something that your book revealed, discovered. or pioneered in science using only that book.

If you cant, then I have a really simple reply for you and your claims: you can’t come running up on science’s coat tails, waving your holy book around, and squealing “I knew that all along! I was only testing you!” like some idiotic little bratty child who is too proud to admit when he’s just dead fucking wrong. I mean, it looks egregiously stupid, arrogant, uninformed, and immature. It’s also selfish because you’re trying to claim advances on your side which you never, ever, made or had anything to do with.

The fact is, religious people: you got nothing; nada; zilch; zip. You got some words written by people who knew absolutely nothing at all about the world around them, about the stars, microbes, evolution, geology, chemistry, medicine, or a whole lot of other things which we have discovered since they were written, and those words are obscure at best. They are so obscure and wishy-washy at times that you can’t even make out what they mean. Other people have to actually come along, discard those books, and then figure shit out on their own using actual logic, reason, experimentation, and a rigid set of laws with tons and tons of hard work and even more failure than you can imagine before a success, before you peevishly are able to climb up on what they’ve built with their hard work and say “Hey! I was here first! This is mine! My stuff beat you to it and knew about this all along!” like some dumbass little pipsqueak sidekick that, frankly, I want to just kick aside into the corner like the annoying little rodents that you are.

So, if you think that’s an unfair comparison, then put up or shut up: what the fuck has your holy book actually discovered, since it is so blessed with infinite knowledge, that it alone can claim the discovery to with absolutely zero scientific help whatsoever?

Anything? My guess is: Nothing.

And if that’s the case, then please shut the hell up about your book knowing more about science than science itself. It doesn’t know squat about science. That’s why, when you go to study astronomy, medicine, biology, or any other actual science, the first book they tell you to crack open and start reading isn’t your “special” book. In fact, it’s not even on the same bookshelf as any of the others.

Maybe most theists are too stupid to understand this, but that’s a major fucking clue.